By Jay-Dani “Ousmane Atheneus Aabid Aakil Fārūq Farzan” Guzmán Sánchez ~
"Call Me By Your Name" introduces a romance story incorporating the now-known LGBTQ+ community, in a familiar yet impactful manner, even for those outside that same community. To unpack this perspective, I shall explain that I am not a part of the LGBTQ+ community. There are, however, people in my circle of friends and family who do identify in this way, and to me, they are just like everybody else. With my assumptions established, it's worth noting the significance this book holds for me. I was first introduced to it during my senior seminar in English at Lehman College, a place that holds particular significance, as the alma mater of the author himself, André Aciman. It's truly remarkable to consider that this global sensation, which has touched the lives of countless individuals and even spawned music and a film adaptation, traces its roots back to our very own community.
As a book enthusiast, I find myself cautiously echoing Aciman's words when he asserts, “People who read are hiders. They hide who they are. People who hide don’t always like who they are.” (Aciman, pg. 114). While I can't claim this sentiment to be a universal truth, it undeniably holds significance to comprehending the intricate narrative that unfolds within these pages and in the unraveling of the people steering this cautionary tale forward. The two central characters, Elio and Oliver, are both products of academically driven families and have embedded themselves deeply in the very books that define them, too. As Jewish homosexual men navigated the terrain of the 1970s, they witnessed the continued struggle for civil rights, including LGBTQ+ rights. It was a time when homosexuality was gradually becoming more visible and accepted, but discrimination and prejudice persisted. The AIDS epidemic, although not yet widely recognized, would soon become a major health crisis.
Yet, not everything in their lives is veiled by the cloak of history or the separate landscapes we and they call home. In a culture that places premium value on logos [logic] for reasoning, we often dismiss the primordial realm of pathos [emotion] as irrelevant, and at times, even contemptible. However, frequently, the distinction between "comprehending" something and failing to grasp it altogether hinges on the presence or absence of understanding within one's own heart. In this logo-centric world, we are prone to disregard the significance of pathos [emotion], yet it holds the key to unlocking deeper layers of meaning in the stories we are prone to encounter. Thus, our ability to comprehend often pivots on the abundance or scarcity of what resides in one’s heart.
As Elio reflects in the book, "I wish I had one friend I wasn’t destined to lose" (Aciman, pg. 180). He goes on to caution us, "We rip out so much of ourselves to be cured of things faster than we should that we go bankrupt by the age of thirty and have less to offer each time we start with someone new. But to feel nothing so as not to feel anything—what a waste!" (Aciman, pg. 217). This story overarches the importance of feeling your emotions, even pain. Those who do not feel pain are not truly alive. They belong to the realm of the living dead. This existence is a test, and those who refuse the test meet their end prematurely. This is true for all. Wisdom is to be had in every story, not just our own… we need to be bold enough to see the lessons.
In the landscape that Elio and Oliver navigate, their divergent paths offer profound insights, Elio grapples with an elusive dream, much like his identity, concealed but not forgotten. Conversely, Oliver forges a fulfilling existence, embracing family, and contentment. Their journeys serve as a poignant reminder that life often presents unexpected twists and turns. What we should aspire to, like Oliver, is to find purpose and fulfillment in the ever-changing landscape of living. Elio and Oliver remind us of the resilience needed to navigate life's uncertainties and reveal that, in the end, purpose transcends the goals we set, as these goals are ever-changing while purpose remains a timeless beacon guiding us forward.
Best Readings,
J-D.O.A.A.F.F.G.S. ~
